HOW TO TURN A GUY DOWN:
He: Can I buy you a drink?
She: Actually, i’d rather have the money
He: I’m a photographer. I’ve been looking for a face like yours.
She: I’m a plastic surgeon. I’ve been looking for a face like yours.
He: Your face must turn a few heads.
She: And your face must turn a few stomachs.
He: Haven’t I seen you some place before?
She: Yes, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.
He: If I could see you naked, I’d die happy.
She: If I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing.
He: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
She: Unfertilized.
He: I want to give myself to you.
She: Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.
He: Didn’t we go on a date once? or was it twice?
She: Must’ve been once. I never make the same mistake twice…
haha not mine.
Joe Jonas in UnPunkable
Someone needs to insert the text: “Bitch, please” in the top left corner gif.
lolol yes
(Source: ourtangledvines)
EXPECTATION:
REALITY:
(Source: kimpoyfeliciano)
“Since we’re keeping it primal, you smell good,” he observed.
“It’s called a shower…,” I began automatically, then trailed off. My memory snagged, taken aback by a compelling and forceful sense of undue familiarity. “Soap, shampoo, hot water,” I added, almost as an afterthought.
“Naked. I know the drill,” Jev said, something unreadeble passing over his eyes.”
Hold me close and hold me fast
The magic spell you cast
This is la vie en rose
When you kiss me heaven sighs
& though I close my eyes
I see la vie en rose.
When you press me to your heart
I’m in a world apart
A world where roses bloom
& when you speak, angels sing from above
Everyday words seem to turn into love songs
Give your heart and soul to me
And life will always be la vie en rose.
(via ilovegeoffrey)
(Source: shesbombb, via stuckinher-daydreamm)
